


Now, Panic and Freak Out

by dropdeadfox



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: AU, Fluff, I Don't Even Know, M/M, alternative universe, i'm sorry guys, what is this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-09-22 11:09:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9605297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dropdeadfox/pseuds/dropdeadfox
Summary: The thing is, Isak Valtersen is absolutely not gay.  Like, really, really, really not gay.Okay, he may or may not feel butterflies in his stomach whenever he sees a certain third year across the school yard. A handsome and certainly very male third year.  And he may or may not wish that said third year will sit beside him at the cafeteria, holding his hand under the table or pushing his hair back with those adorably long fingers, because he is certainly, absolutely, 100% sure that he is Not Gay.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into 中文 available: [[授權翻譯] Now, Panic and Freak Out](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9636506) by [zzm702](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zzm702/pseuds/zzm702)



> I don't know how to write fiction, so my writing may be quite stiff. I've been on this site for maybe a year, two years now, but I never never never ever had the guts to write anything. I don't even know what this is! And I think there's not much meat/ plot in this story, but I started writing and I couldn't stop. Sorrypleasedon'thatemethanks :/

The thing is, Isak Valtersen is absolutely not gay. Like, really, really, really not gay.

Okay, he may or may not feel butterflies in his stomach whenever he sees a certain third year across the school yard. A handsome and certainly very male third year. And he may or may not wish that said third year will sit beside him at the cafeteria, holding his hand under the table or pushing his hair back with those adorably long fingers, because he is certainly, absolutely, 100% sure that he is Not Gay.

\--

It all started three weeks ago, during the school's annual start- of- the- year assembly. He was huddled with his boys and exchanging random memes and jokes in their group chat to help them get through the mind- numbing speeches (seriously, it's the same every. single. year) when he got blinded by a light that seems to be bouncing off the windows. He wasn't really intending to look for the source, but he guesses he did it on autopilot. Looking around, he spotted a pair of shades slung on the collar of white t- shirt, where the reflection seems to be coming from. His eyes travelled to the shirt and then downwards, because holy shit what a body, and then back up to that very alluring neck. Feeling himself getting a bit winded upon seeing his adam's apple bob up and down, he then zeroed in on very blue, very expressive eyes... who are looking right back at him. He cursed under his breath when he realized that this boy is smirking at him, and he quickly averted his gaze. He reasoned with himself that he was just distracted with the light bouncing off the windows and that his heart did not beat a lot faster in his chest. It took all of his effort and willpower to glue his eyes on his phone and tried to drown himself in another battle of memes with his boys. No one noticed, right? He’s fine. He’s the master of being fine.

\--

Wrong. How very wrong.

Since that day, this handsome third year seems to be everywhere. At the cafeteria during lunch time, at the school yard before his first class, sitting on the benches by the bike racks after last period, and hanging out with his friends near Isak’s locker in between classes. The swooping in his stomach each time he sees this blonde Elvis seems to intensify as each day progressed, and the fact that Isak is so confused with his sexuality is not helping matters. Although, he thinks that him being gay explained a lot of things- like how he doesn’t find any of the girls in his school pretty or hot, and how kissing said girls at parties does absolutely nothing for him. 

Okay, so maybe Isak is a little gay. What he also is, at this moment, is confused and desperate, enough to ask help from his roommate, Eskild. He has been living with Eskild for almost five months now, since said guy took him in after seeing Isak plastered at a gay bar at two in the morning. Eskild, being the absolute angel that he is, answered all of Isak’s questions regarding his Confused Sexuality. He also patiently explained how very wrong Isak was in his stereotypes against the LGBT community. More than taking him in, Isak was extremely thankful for his guru for educating him without being mean or weird about the whole thing. In the end, though, Eskild just shrugged and said:

“Didn’t you already ask all these questions in your head when you realized I took you home from a freaking gay bar when you were drunk out of your wits?”

And yeah, really, that sort of put things in perspective for him.

\--

Right now, though, Isak is inside a bathroom and he is not panicking. He is the epitome of Cool, Calm, and Collected. He is absolutely not freaking out, nope.

It’s been two months since he first saw Even, (the blonde Elvis has a name now, due to a lot of sleuthing on Isak’s part), and a month since he admitted to himself that he is, in fact, gay. He was planning on telling his boys- Jonas, Magnus, and Mahdi- eventually. He was kinda hoping that by being honest with his sexuality and admitting it, he will shake off his pathetic little crush on the gorgeous Even.

He blames it on his lack of sleep, really. He’s always had trouble sleeping, but the nights got longer when he first realized how infatuated he was with Even. It’s not like the guy does anything. He just struts around in his stupidly perfect hair and dazzling smile and annoyingly perfect eyebrows which can rival Jonas’, ignoring the young sophomore who is already half in love with him, at this point. Isak absolutely blames him for the sleepless nights, making him extremely more exhausted during class hours. It doesn’t help that the frequency in which they passed each other on the hallways or the times he’d seen Even in school has exponentially increased.

He was having lunch with his boys, but it’s been over a week since he got a decent night’s sleep, and his brain- to- mouth filter is simply not working. He feels almost drunk due to sleep- deprivation, so really, he couldn’t and shouldn’t be blamed for answering everything with honesty, consequences be damned. The boys are talking about girls they would like to hook up with on a party happening that weekend, with the exception of Jonas, who is eternally devoted to Eva, when Magnus innocently asked Isak who he has his eyes on. When Isak, with eyes half- closed and without pausing to think, blurted out and rambled- “Even, that tall, hot third year but I still can’t figure out if he is gay or not, I mean, it’s been months and I still don’t know if he’s into guys but I’d really like to kiss him and make out with him and hook up with him” the boys was stunned into silence for ten seconds before collectively throwing questions at Isak:

“Even? Who the fuck is Even?”  
“Are you gay now?”  
“What do you mean Even?”  
“WHO THE FUCK IS EVEN?”  
“Is that a boy’s name?”  
“What the fuck, Isak?”  
“Isn’t Even a dude’s name?”  
“WAIT WHAT DO YOU MEAN EVEN?”  
“You mean you don’t like girls?”  
“WHO THE FUCK IS EVEN?”

It took Isak the same amount of time to realize his colossal mistake. His eyes went wide, sleepiness forgotten, and he opened his mouth to say something, but can’t seem to get a word in with three boys screaming at him. Isak realized that some people from a few tables away were looking at them curiously, and when Jonas sensed his panic, he asked both Magnus and Mahdi to calm down. At this point, Magnus was bouncing up and down his seat, and something along the lines of “I can’t believe I have a gay friend, YAY” can be heard from him, all while his eyes are shining bright and his mouth cracked in a huge grin. Mahdi’s face was both confused and amused, while Jonas was simply looking at him, waiting patiently for an explanation. Training his eyes on the table and his finished lunch, he decided that, while he never planned it this way, now is as a good a time as he is going to get to come out to his friends.

“Uhhh, well, you see… I… Well….” That’s as far as he got before he took one look at his friends, quickly gathered his stuff, and practically ran out of the cafeteria, directly to the bathroom where he always hangs out with the boys whenever they don’t feel like going out to the school yard or cafeteria. He’s grateful that this bathroom is almost unused, for some weird reason, which, in their opinion, made it unofficially theirs. He banged his snapback- covered head on the bathroom mirror, all the while cursing himself under his breath. He closed his eyes and convinced himself that he is not panicking, and that his friends seem to take it well, and that it’s fucking 2017, Isak, you don’t have to hide in the closet… or the bathroom, for that matter.

Suffice it to say that Isak is definitely freaked out now, so, for the second time that day, he cannot be held accountable for being distracted. He still had his eyes closed when he heard the bathroom door open. He didn’t look at the newcomer, assuming that it was one of his friends since, duh, no one ever uses this bathroom anyway, so he simply opened his mouth and spoke, quite heatedly-

“Yes, I’m gay, and yes, I have a huge crush on a third year named Even who doesn’t know I exist, and yes, I’m sure I don’t like girls. Any more questions?”

He opened his eyes in horror when the low chuckle he heard was definitely not that of Magnus’, Mahdi’s, or Jonas’. His eyes widened even further, cheeks red in sheer embarrassment when he realized that it was actually Even who walked in the bathroom and not any of his friends. He was prepared to make a huge joke out the whole crush thing, thinking of something to say to make the last thirty seconds go away when Even, casually leaning by the bathroom door like the James Dean-ish person that he is and smiling like the cat who ate the canary, spoke and said- “I’m very glad to know that, Isak.”

It took Isak an embarrassingly long time to realize that Even- the Even- already knows his name, and even longer to form a coherent response. When he finally recovered, all he was able to come up with was- “What are you doing here?” Even chuckled at that again and walked right in front of Isak, holding his gaze. He smiled even bigger while he said- “Well, I came to follow you and see if you were alright since, you know, I sort of heard my name being said by your friends multiple times in the cafeteria. Had to see what was up.” Even folded his arms across his chest and nope, Isak was definitely not staring at his biceps. Isak’s cheeks turned even redder, if that were even possible, at the thought of Even knowing about his stupid little (not little) crush on him now. “Yeah, well… You know, you're hot… And….” Isak groaned, closed his eyes, and banged his head against the mirror after realizing what he said. Even will totally think he’s a creep now. He’s willing himself to open his eyes, fully prepared to have an entire speech as to how sorry he was for what happened, and bracing himself on the idea that Even wants nothing to do with him now because he’s probably straight, damn it, Isak, and subsequently running away, because that’s the best solution to any problem, right? He was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn’t realize that Even, that bastard, was smirking at him again and was looking more amused, if that were even possible. Even took a step towards him and, since Isak is the picture of courage at that moment, he simply refused to open his eyes because he just knows what’s going to happen next. Even will probably punch him or say something about how he’s not gay and how dare Isak tell his friends that he has a crush on him. Well, he’s not exactly sure, but something like that.

So, Isak was thoroughly, completely, and absolutely surprised when he felt warm, slender hands on his cheeks, somewhat coaxing him to open his eyes. When he finally did, beautiful blue orbs were staring right back at him, and he was briefly taken back to that time when he first saw Even. Then Even spoke, so quietly Isak would’ve missed it, had they not been so close together, and said- “I’d really like to kiss you and make out with you and hook up with you, too, so can we just get to that part now and figure everything out later?” Before Isak can fully comprehend that Even heard what I said, fuck fuck fuck, soft and slightly chapped lips were pressing on his very, very lightly. After a few seconds, he finally realized what was happening, that Even was actually kissing him shit, and he responded by wrapping an arm around Even’s waist to pull the taller boy closer and bury his free hand in his hair. That seems to be all the signal that Even was waiting for because suddenly, their kiss became insistent and hot, all teeth and tongue, making Isak’s head spin with the lack of oxygen and lack of coherent thoughts. All he can hear in his brain right now is Even Even Even.

\--

For very obvious reasons, they didn’t go back to class for the rest of the afternoon. Before first period the following day, when they walked to Isak’s group of friends, hands entwined and both with stupid smiles on their faces, Isak introducing Even to his friends, he thinks to himself- Isak Valtersen is absolutely gay. Like, really, really, really gay.


End file.
